The Case of the Big Rock Mountain Pop Out

Veggie burger eating competition, Slovakia.

Image via Wikipedia

“Refresh my memory,” I suggest.

“Oh, it was a year ago,” Charley Kno recalls.

“You and the WeenerMan were in training for the Clover County Iron-Bum Contest,” Honey Dew giggles, “Representing your WeenerMan Township.”

“And as I recall, the WeenerMan took the title last year,” Charley Kno recalls, “Edged you out in the 4×4 Burger eating contest by point two-five seconds.”

“It was something of an upset,”Honey Dew giggles, “You’d bummed your way to the title the prior three years.”

“Well, I’ll get him this year,” I vow underneath my breath.

“It was something of an upset,” Charley Kno sympathizes.

“But you have to give the Weenerman some credit,” Honey Dew adds, “He’s quite the accomplished bummer himself.”

“But I think you’ll defend the title this year,” Charley Kno encourages me.

“You’ll always be the Number One; AOK, Barney Bum with us,” Honey Dew reassures me.

“Yeah,” I reply rethinking which end of the jest I’d just ended up on, “Geee, Thanks.”

Charley goes on, ‘So what brought you guys to the Chinese Grill and American Takeout?”

I shrug, “The American TakeOut for sure, we were in training.”

Charley raises an eye-brow, “Eating three 4×4 Burgers apiece was training?”

“In the world of the IronBum Competition it is,” I explain, “The 4×4 Burger Trial is one of the key tests.”

“So you were in training?” Charley asks me.

“Well. not everything at once,” I exp-lain, ‘You never know the exact mix they will throw at you in the Iron-Bum Challenge.”

I go on, “The Top Fence-rail Marathon is always standard. It is teh first event in the trial.”

“The Fence-Rail Marathon?” Charley Kno asks.

“Yep, it involves sitting on a top-rail of a gate 3/4 inches wide for an hour, sort of sets you up for the rest of the Trial,”

“I can see why they would call it the Iron-Bum,” Honey Dew Kno comments.


About offroad2084

Work on the Work In Progress, MyDay in HicksTown. A light-hearted look at life in the fictional town of HicksTown in WeenerMan Township.
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